What A Creep!

This is a tale of woe that for lack of a better name I will call Cindy's Bogus Dating Adventure. As you may have guessed already, I am Cindy.
When this story unfolded, I was working as a clerk in a 7-11 store just outside of Boston. Not to sound conceited, but men have always hit on me a lot, so I am sort of used to it in a way. This particular guy seemed really nice, and had been working on me for months before I finally relented. We had actually met online just before I started working at the variety store. I was always cautious so I decided to meet him in a very public place instead of riding alone with him anywhere. We met at a restaurant, and since it was a nice night, we opted to eat outside. Here is where he got a little odd…. first he gives me a a little box of chocolates the brand name was Cindy (my name is Cindy so I thought at first that it was a cute gesture) then he asks me to eat one or two in a strange creepy way. When we finished the hors d'oeuvres he started to ply me with chocolates. Making a game of it by getting me to eat it looking as sexy as I could. I was feeling a bit light headed, and put that down to the wine we were drinking, but was confused because I had only had a sip or two. At the point that we started to eat our entrees, he started to stare at me really closely. It was almost creepy, but for some reason, I was not overly alarmed.
The wine he chose was very tasty and smooth. I am not a huge wine drinker, but I thought that I could get to love that particular label. I did notice though, that as we kept dining, that the wine seemed to be not tasting as good. I figured that was because I had eaten so many sweet chocolates.
I was part way through the main course when the entire situation started to weird me out. I made my excuses and went to the washroom to call a good friend of mine to explain the situation. I was worried that maybe I was blowing this all out of proportion. My friend thought it was hilarious and told me just to be careful and not go anywhere alone with him, but to get a free meal out of the deal. So assured, I went back to my seat, at which point he resumes the chocolate game again. I was young and naive so I just went with it, at this point it was kind of funny. Since I had never been in a similar situation before, I just wrote it all off to 'gaining experiences for the next time' and keep being nice.
Feeling a bit uncomfortable, I sort of gulped my wine. As soon as the wine entered my mouth I could tell something was wrong. It was awful! I casually put it down as if I had noticed nothing. It was obvious to me that he had put something in my wine. Suddenly I was scared! I needed to figure out what to do, but I needed time to put a plan together. So I sat there as if nothing was wrong, and even pretended that I was sipping my wine. After about a half hour of stalling and making small talk, I laughingly told him that the wine must be getting to me because I had to go to the washroom again.
I needed to get out of there pronto! So I had a busboy locate our waiter and bring him over. I told him what was up and asked him to help. He had a busboy take me out the back way to my car. At the same time, my waiter went back to talk to my date about ordering desert and coffee. I quickly hauled my butt to my friends house. Luckily she only lived a few blocks away because by the time I got there I was ready to pass out. I managed to convince my friend that I did not need to go to the hospital. So we spent some time listening to music and I fell asleep. I woke up a little hung over, and it was not from the small amounts of wine I had consumed the night before. With a clearer head, it became apparent to me that the scumbag had likely laced my wine and likely the chocolates with some sort of drug. I realized that I had had a close call and was lucky to get out of it unscathed.
Looking back on it, I regretted not calling the police from the restaurant to keep this freak from doing the same thing to another innocent girl, but I was young and  foolish and didn’t think about that. In the state of mind I was in, it was all I could do to focus on getting out with my skin intact.  I explained my problem to the mall security guards, and they were really good about it. For a few months, they kept a lookout for him and escorted me out to my vehicle when I worked late. To my intense relief, I never saw hide nor hair of him again.
It dawned on me a while later how it was that he found me. I had put my work address on my dating site profile. What an idiot I was! I deleted my profile for a couple of months and then signed up with a new handle. That night could have been so much more nasty than it was. I thank my lucky stars that I had a mother who loved me. One who nagged me stupid about the perverts out there and what sorts of care I should take when going on dates.

For more advice with online dating, see the link below:
Online Dating Advice

I'm Not On The Menu

Several years ago I found my self alone, when my husband, and father of my 2 children, left us. I entered a period where I worked hard, looked after my kids as best I could, and had virtually no social life to speak of. My two best friends, also single mothers, helped get me through this period. What social life we had was usually at one of our homes together, snacking, watching TV, or just talking. Often our conversations wandered into what type of man we would like to have in our lives the next time love came calling. Of course we didn't really expect to meet our “Mr Perfect” anytime soon.

A friend of mine suggested that maybe I try out this brand new dating site that had just started up. I'll call it, “MEN-R-US” to avoid any liability issues so I went online to give it a go. I met this dork, I mean male shortly after joining, he seemed smart, seemed articulate and humorous. We chatted back and forth for a few weeks, as I informed him that I wanted to take things slow and that it had been a long time since I had been with a man in any kind of a relationship. I brought up the subject of my children early on, and he was fine with that because he said he had a son as well. He said that he loved kids and that being with his son was the biggest joy in his life. Everything seemed good to me, so I agreed to go out for dinner and dancing with him.

I went all out for that date! Hair, manicure, new dress, everything! I had arranged for a good friend to babysit and had picked her up earlier. As I sat there putting on my makeup, I was totally stressed out that he would not find me acceptable. I have to admit that I was halfway in love with the guy and I had not even met him. I really wanted this to work out. My friend told me to calm down before I hyperventilated, she told me to try not to look too needy or I would scare him off.  If only I had, this story would have had a different ending! So after collecting my self I went outside to wait for him as he was going to swing by and pick me up. Suddenly, there he was! I was so impatient to set my eyes on his gorgeous body, dreamy green eyes and wavy blond hair that I literally rushed up to his car as it pulled into the driveway. I bent over to say hi and was shocked senseless! I hoped that it was not him and that he had sent a friend over to tell me that he could not make it. I actually pinched myself to wake up from this horrible dream, but to no avail. There he sat, and he sure was not what I was expecting! I was so stunned that I just stood there like a dumb mute. Not knowing what else to do, I silently got into the car.

All the way to the restaurant I keep asking my self why are you in a car with a guy who looks like hes wearing a squirrel on his head. I guess I fell for the oldest online dating trick in the book. The fake profile picture..  He looked to be bald under that cheap rug. But the more I looked at it, the more it seemed that he just had it on wrong. Backwards or something stupid like that. His eyes were not the amazing green of the online profile either. He had dark eyes that were all bloodshot. He looked like he had a serious drug addiction. The well toned muscles in the picture were nowhere in evidence on this sorry excuse for a man. On top of everything, his idea of a top ranked restaurant was slightly better than a MacDonald's, only not as clean.  I prayed that no one I knew would see me with this dork, not just for my own sake but because I did not think my children could ever live it down.

We walked in and sat down at a corner table with a white table cloth and a candle in a little glass. It was actually not that bad looking from the inside. The decor was nice, and the waiters were all dressed in suits and ties. Maybe his idea of classy was not that bad after all. I had a chicken caesar and he had pork chops. He had a bad case of roman hands and russian fingers if you get my drift. My hand was sore from slapping at him before the entree was served. He made a remark about me being hot to trot since I had not had sex in years, and how I must be raring to have at it with a real man. I politely told him if I wanted to be with a real man I would not be here with him. After eating, he asked me to dance. Once again, I had to keep removing his hands from various parts of my anatomy. I guess to show me what a great catch he was he decided to show off his dancing prowess. He tried to jive with me. At one point his hand slipped out of mine and I stumbled into the bar. Well that was about all I could take. I stormed out of the restaurant and caught a cab outside to the hospital. I was lucky that my broken nose set almost straight. In any event it is a constant reminder that I need to be more careful.

No more dating advice for me! From that point on I did my own site sleuthing. I worked long and hard and found several decent sites.


During my site research, I found the following link, and it made it easy for me to select sites that were the best for me.:

Online Personals

Are Gay Men Shallow

 Some people believe that all gay men are shallow when it comes to finding someone they would like to have a long term relationship with. But that just isn’t how it is.  Sure many of us prefer someone who is healthy as well as physically fit; heck you can say the same thing about heterosexuals as well. In fact sometimes it is hard for people that do not fit that criteria to find a partner. It can be even harder for gay men because they make up a smaller part of the general population. Some gay men are shallow and there's not a lot you can do to change that. My idea is that if they do not like me then they can kiss my not so flabby tush.

With age comes wisdom, and as gay men mature, they will tend to mellow out and look for someone who is more of a friend than just a hot body. But until that day comes you might just have to take what you can get, or try going to the gym once in awhile. Appearance is definitely a big factor, but it is not the only thing in the game of love between young gay men. Not many guys want to date someone that is over weight. Personally looks are still an important factor before I would think about about approaching another man, let alone start a relationship with them.  If that makes me shallow, so be it, but I know what I want. 

 Why are so many young gay men interested in slim trim athletic types? Guys in general are sexual creatures and want to have sex with good looking guys. This is also true for many young men are only looking for sex and not any form of long term commitment. But with varying 'attractive' criteria in different cultures, it is still possible for chubby men to get action. It really does not matter the reasons why people choose the way they do. Some people just behave this way when it comes to picking a lover its just who they are.

I know many people in my life that I would not consider dating, but I still like them as friends. I have some great friends that I cherish for the friends that they are, and I met the majority of them via online dating sites. I love meeting people online because it tends to push my extended network of friends so much farther than I could ever do within my existing network of pals. You might think that I am callous because I can see what they look like before I put the moves on them, but it is more than that. Many of them are people that I happened to meet in chat rooms on dating sites and I became interested in them because of what they had to say. I have not dated many of them, but I do consider many of them to be among my circle of friends now. With my busy life style, I do not get a lot of opportunities to just troll bars looking for a lay, so my escape hatch is gay dating sites where I can hang out for a short time talking to people that I have come to know and respect.

I think I am at that cusp in my life where I am transitioning from casual pickups to a long term commitment. I am not quite ready to make the commitment jump yet, but I am thinking that a few longer term relationships might help me get past the fear that I have of being exclusive with just one person. For me, online dating is a useful tool that helps me find new tools (LOL). If you start dating and the person seems to be rushing it and making you uncomfortable, it is easy to move on. And if by chance they start to hassle you online, well all you have to do is block them, with online dating sites your real email address phone number and address are never given out so there's no worry about someone bothering you unless you were stupid and gave them your personal contact information already.  The best thing though is that most of the men on dating sites are just like you, and are unlikely to push themselves on someone where the affection is not being returned.

Most men are not overly particular about your looks. They are primarily looking for someone to hang with. They would like someone with similar interests, who is intellectually challenging and has compatible personality traits. Someone who is  compassionate, caring and giving. Someone who's company they can enjoy. Someone who will be there in the morning.

So if your looking for love in all the wrong places then join an online dating site to expand your horizons. There are literally hundreds of gay dating sites just waiting to help you meet someone special. They have members from all walks of life and religions all looking for someone to share their time and lives with. So why wait? Get off your butt, get online and check them out. You won't be disappointed. If nothing else you're sure to make some good friends. Below is the link to the site that I use, they have so many sites to chose from, I'm sure you'll find one that has what your looking for.

http://www.top100datingpersonals.com/gaydating.php

Helping Your Female Partner Have Orgasms

A few generations ago, most adult females never experienced and orgasm. In fact, a lot of them had no idea what an orgasm was.  Many women were brought up with no sexual instruction, and often made to believe that sex was a painful wifely duty. A twin study done in 2005 reported that one woman in three had never or seldom had an orgasm, and just one tenth always achieved an orgasm. As you can see, orgasms are rare or non-existent for many women. A woman who cannot have an orgasm has as frustrating a life as a man with an erectile disfunction.

So how can we change this, especially since almost all modern women desire orgasms. Well let's begin by exploring what a female orgasm really is.  An orgasm in women is not overly different from that in men-there is a peak of sexual excitement, in a moment of incredible enjoyment, and a pulsing, electric sensation that extends throughout the body.  The rhythmic contractions take place within the pelvic area as well as the walls of the vagina. Another difference here is that women don't experience a refractory period, and will usually be able to have many more orgasms with continued stimulation, often within a minute or two. In most women, there is no fluid ejaculated during orgasm.  This is important for men to understand so that they understand that a woman can have a completely satisfying orgasm without ejaculating.

With the right stimulation, most women can have multiple orgasms if they so desire.

Women all their sensual ducks in a row before they can achieve an orgasm. For instance:

1) Women  must feel appreciated, and wanted A situation charged with romance
3) A partner whom they really like
4) Tranquil surroundings
5) A partner that knows how to stimulate the clitoris

You will not have great success in giving your partner orgasms if you fail to provide most of the above.

Men need to know that women will have different varieties of orgasms---the most common is the clitoral orgasm.  The clitoris can be stimulated by fingers or through oral sex. The clitoral orgasm can have fluid expelled or be dry, and results in contractions within the uterus . Another type of orgasm is cntered on the G-spot. The G spot is a little harder to find: it is located on the upper side of the vagina – about one half way in. In most women the G-spot is about 3 inches into the vagina, and on the top side.  Gentle but firm pressure is required to find the G spot if the woman is not stimulated yet.  It is a slightly more pliable area about 1/3 of an inch in size. The location and size varies somewhat from woman to woman.  When properly manipulated, the G spot will result in a vaginal orgasm.

Figure 1, Internal Female Anatomy:




In summation, sex is something amazing that can provide both partners with intense pleasure. The following can help both of you have orgasms regularly:

1) Women like affection---use your hands, and or mouth to caress her body Be gentle, especially when touching her genitals, or rubbing her clitoris
3) Orally stimulate her breasts with kissing and gentle sucking
4) Be slow – unlike most sports, this is one situation where fast is definitely a bad thing
5) Ask her if she likes what you are doing and ask her to tell you what she wants
6) Be a tease- touching her pleasurable spots then withdrawing over, and over again. This will build arousal, and heighten orgasm.
7) Use your own natural lubrication to moisten her clitoris – however she may need additional lubrication, you can buy lubricants at any drugstore.
8) Learn her body- does her nipples get hard only during arousal or are they like that at other times
9) Try new things as variety can add to the pleasure
10) Do not push to try new things – experimentation must be mutual or else it will cause you to lose the moment

All men, can use this as a guide to helping your women have a more pleasurable experience, and helping her achieve many orgasms.

If you are an unsatisfied woman – convince your partner to read this article, after all, your entire future is at stake!

Good Luck!

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http://www.top100datingpersonals.com/advice_for_men.php